White guy thumbing

I don’t mean to offend anyone with this post.  I read it over several times.  I don’t think it’s so bad, but, you never know. 

That’s the existence of the white guy.  You go along thinking that everything you do is pretty much acceptable, because most of the time you’re surrounded by other equally insensitive white guys, until everything blows up in your face and you realize you’ve offended everyone and you’re just privileged scum.

Sensitivity training for you! 

You no blog, one year!

I’ll just say ahead of time that I’m sorry…  or not sorry… whatever I’m supposed to be as someone who is well intentioned, but ill-advised.

I don't think I'm any more racially biased than I am about any other natural bias that I'm probably not conscious of. I may be biased against lefties...I'm not aware of it, but its certainly possible.

Then again, I don't really have any black friends. Is that bad? Am I supposed to? If so, how many?

You know, I mentored an Indian finance student and 99% of her friends were Indian.

I said she could just call me “Token”.

Oh, wait...

Indians are white, too...or...I mean.. Caucasian. Is that the same thing?

In the UK, they're called Asian. 


How's that one group? So Ghandi and Yao Ming are both Asian?


At that point, what's the point of doing any grouping whatsoever? Might as well just call all of them "people".

Or am I supposed to be color blind and not notice? We have a black guy on our dodgeball team, but he never shows. Maybe he doesn't like us because we're white. Are we unconsciously making him feel uncomfortable because he's black... or is it more because he's just slowfooted? Perhaps it's the latter. Are we allowed to be biased against the slow footed?

He was born that way probably--slow footed, I mean. 

I don’t know if he was born black.  That might have been a lifestyle choice.  I didn’t want to pry.

We don't have any Asians. They're not white, either, I guess—even though I’m darker than just about all of them.

I was always confused how they got counted as a "minority" anyway.  I mean, sure, there’s less of them around, but there are less of everyone when compared to some other group, if you think about it—except “people”.  There’s never more people than in the “people” group.

There's a program for getting finance students from minority groups into banks and they included Asians. Given all the cultural stereotypes that exist in the world, does the Asian guy who went to NYU Stern need an extra boost over the Italian from Bensonhurst?  Who’s more likely to convince Goldman Sachs they'd be the harder working quantitative investment banking analyst? Hey, I don't mean to offend anyone or perpetuate any stereotypes further, I'm just saying...

Besides, is "hardworking and really smart" the worst stereotype to have in the world? I don't think that's so bad.

I'll trade you the "privileged and lazy" white American stereotype for smart and hardworking any day.

I've never dated an Asian or Black girl either..not for lack of trying, though. Perhaps bald white guys don't have cross cultural curb appeal. I don't know. I tried really hard to date this Asian girl that looked like Tia Carrere in high school, but her parents wouldn't allow her to date. 

Well, that was what she told me anyway.  I guess sometimes cultural stereotypes are sometimes convenient date excuses as well.

Asian women sometimes get offended if one of the reasons that you want to date them is the fact that they’re Asian—no Asian fetishes, please!  Well, what if you actually like their culture and happen to find their look attractive?  Is that bad?  Some people love tall blondes, but you’ll never hear a Swede say, “No Scandinavian fetishes!”

No Italian fetishes, please!  I’m not interested in any girl that wants me because of my darker complexion, fuzziness, ability to cook, or thickheadedness.  Hmm… what’s left, then?

Barack Obama's impending presidency has caused a lot of white people...and frankly a lot of people in general to think about the nature of race in this country.

Frankly, us dumb white guys are a little confused about what we're supposed to be thinking about it.

We don't want to offend anyone, get sued, or get our asses kicked...so just tell us what're supposed to think and do.

Are we supposed to acknowledge the fact that he's Black (or partly) and celebrate the breaking of historical barriers?  Or, are we in a new era where we're past all that grouping and we are, in fact, all just people?

Like I said...I don't care either way. I just don't want to get in trouble or lose my radio advertisers.