Making Time: The Standing Appointment

This was quite a weekend for me--both personally and professionally.  I had a rough day on Friday at work that kind of threw me for a loop.  That wasn't enough, though, as I got a call Friday night from my dad that my mom's cousin--a woman I saw less than a week ago at my parents' 50th anniversary--passed away.  Apparently, she had a stroke or heart attack and just went--just like that--while on the phone with one of her kids.  She was my mom's closest friend and they spoke almost everyday.

I didn't realize they spoke that often, but, actually, it made me happy--happy to know that they made time for each other through all of life's distractions.  It's something I've been working on a lot more lately.  In fact, I've created a little mechanism to help me out with that--the standing appointment.

I have a small group of friends that I would love to see regularly, but that I often find that our lives don't intersect nearly enough.  I have a friend from junior high whose friendship I really appreciate, but since she's a corporate lawyer and really the only person I hangout with from that social circle, I don't see her unless we make a point of it.  This summer, we tried a few times to get dinner, but it didn't work.  Eventually, we realized we missed the whole summer. 

That's when I suggested we just pick a day once a month to always be our day to get together.  If we have to move it, we move it.  If we miss it, we try to make it up--but at least we know that each time a new month comes up, we've already penciled each other in.  Thanks to Google calendar, we'll be friends for the rest of our lives. 

Life, particularly in the startup world, is a series of ups and downs.  It's on the downside when your truest friends emerge, and also when life makes it clear who isn't your friend at all.  The key is to hold on to your best relationships at all costs and to let pass those who were only in it for the short term gain or out for themselves.  They'll come and go. 

Your real friends--they'll be on repeat. 

Thanks to everyone who made time for me recently--even if it was just a few minutes to drop a note.